eCondolence.com has compiled a list of suggested reading relating to loss and mourning. Selections are divided by four categories: General, Loss of a Child, For Grieving Children, and Faith-Based Coping.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, M.D. (July 8, 1926 – August 24, 2004) was a Swiss-born psychiatrist and a pioneer in near-death studies. She proposed what is now known as the Kübler-Ross model. In this work she proposed the now famous Five Stages of Grief as a pattern of adjustment.
SYNOPSIS
On Death & Dying is one of the most important psychological studies of the late twentieth century. Considered a classic on the presentation of the five stages of grief, this work characterizes the threads that many people go through as they are processing the grief of loss. Kubler-Ross offers practical insights into progressing through each stage.
The Granger E. Westberg was considered a pioneer in the interrelationship of religion and medicine, and in holistic health care. He held a joint professorship in medicine and religion at the University of Chicago and a professorship in preventive medicine at the University of Illinois College of Medicine.
Good Grief is a classic best-seller that for fifty-years has helped millions of readers find comfort and hope after loss. The book identifies ten stages of grief – shock, emotion, depression, physical distress, panic, guilt, anger, resistance, hope and acceptance. Clearly stating there is no “right” way to grieve, the book offers valuable insights into the natural responses people may face during the grieving process.
Kevin Young is not only author to six vividly imagined collections, including Dear Darkness, but has also compiled several great anthologies, including this one, The Art of Losing: Poems of Grief & Healing.
The Art of Losing is the first anthology of its kind, delivering poetry with a purpose. Editor Kevin Young has introduced and selected 150 devastatingly beautiful poems that embrace the pain and heartbreak of mourning. Divided into five sections (Reckoning, Remembrance, Rituals, Recovery, and Redemption), with poems by some of the world’s most beloved poets as well as the best of the current generation of poets, The Art of Losing is the ideal gift for a loved one in a time of need and for use by therapists, ministers, rabbis, and palliative care workers who tend to those who are experiencing loss.
Theodore Menten is also the author of Gentle Closings, Teddy Bear Studio and A Healing Journal.
Written to first give help in actually saying goodbye to a dying loved one, the book also seeks to provide help for the survivors as they process grief, accept and let go of the pain, and move on after the death. By taking into account the most common elements of the grieving process, this sensitive guide to begin again teaches the bereaved how to work their way through the pain and back to life. With touching personal accounts and honest answers to difficult questions, “After Goodbye” is a valuable resource for easing the pain of loss.
David Kessler is the world’s foremost expert on grief and loss. His experience with thousands of people on the edge of life and death has taught him the secrets to living a happy and fulfilled life, even afterlife’s tragedies. He is the author of six books, including the new bestselling book, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. He coauthored two books with Elisabeth Kubler Ross, including On Grief and Grieving updated her 5 stages for grief. His first book, The Needs of The Dying received praise from Saint (Mother) Teresa.
In 1969, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross first identified the stages of dying in her transformative book On Death and Dying. Decades later, she and David Kessler wrote the classic On Grief and Grieving, introducing the stages of grief with the same transformative pragmatism and compassion. Now, based on hard-earned personal experiences, as well as knowledge and wisdom gained through decades of work with the grieving, Kessler introduces a critical sixth stage: meaning.
Ann Finkbeiner is a freelance science writer, with a focus on astronomy and cosmology, who, after losing her son to an untimely death, wanted to research the long-term affects the loss of a child will have on parents.
Finkbeiner relates her own experiences and pain to show that bereaved parents really can move beyond the tragedy, even though they never completely let go of the struggle. After the death of a child, the parents’ world changes drastically. In After the Death of a Child: Living with Loss Over the Years, Finkbeiner combines thorough research with the interviews of parents who had experienced similar loss to provide guidance to her audience.
Kathleen O’Hara, MA, LPC is an author and psychotherapist who specializes in counseling survivors of Violent Death Trauma, including homicide, suicide, drug over-dose, vehicular homicide, war, terrorism, accident or any sudden and unexpected death.
As a mother, Kathleen O’Hara saw her worst fears realized when her college-aged son was brutally murdered in 1999. In the aftermath of Aaron’s murder, O’Hara developed the seven stage journey that is at the heart of A Grief Like No Other. Although this is a book for those left behind in the aftermath of violence, it offers concrete and practical steps and stages, allowing family and friends safe passage through this incredibly harrowing journey.
Beyond Tears was written by Newsday columnist, Ellen Mitchell, along with nine mothers who had experienced first hand the horrors of losing a child.
Meant to bring comfort and hope to grieving parents, Beyond Tears contains the stories of nine mothers who have lost a child. The nine mothers share what they experienced during the first year with the hopes that it will give guidance to others. The revised edition includes a chapter about surviving siblings.
Gone But Not Lost is a thoughtful gift for a family that has experienced the death of a child. Each of its brief chapters covers one element of grief, bringing the grieving through sorrow and helping them deal with feelings of anger or guilt as well as the marital strain that may follow the loss of a beloved child. The loss of a child brings special challenges for the grieving process that Wiersbe handles in a compassionate and compelling way.
Since 1983, The Dougy Center for Grieving Children and Families has provided support and guidance in a safe place where children, teens and their families grieving a death can share their experiences as they move through their healing process. Based in Portland, Oregon, The Dougy Center works internationally to provide support and training to individuals and organizations seeking to assist children in grief.
35 Ways to Help a Grieving Child provides practical suggestions for helping small children and teens cope with the death of a loved one. This book helps to identify expected behaviors and reactions in children and teens that are normal after the loss of a loved one and provides guidance on how to give comfort.
The material in this book was developed by Certified Grief Therapist, Izetta Smith, M.A. with the assistance of parents, caregivers and professionals helping children in their adjustment to the cancer diagnosis of an adult family member.
When a family member is diagnosed with terminal cancer, stress and grief will affect the entire family, not passing over small children and teens. Finding the right words of explanation and comfort after the diagnosis is challenging, especially when helping to guide children through grief and into the coping process.
Adventure in the Land of Grief provides entirely new ways to work with grieving children. Through the use of drama, theater, role playing and imagery, the authors spark a child’s natural imagination to help them understand death and loss and to process grief. The adventure begins as the children participate in imaginary exploration of different bodies of water and nature that symbolize distinct aspects of the grief process. The process uses elements of creative drama, reader’s theatre, guided imagery, role play, ritual, and boundless childhood imaginations.
H. Norman Wright is a well-respected Christian counselor who has helped thousands of people improve their relationships and deal with grief, tragedy, and other concerns through counseling, seminars and his authorship of and contributions to over 90 books.
Whether one faces loss through personal, family or community disaster, there is potential for change and growth through the loss. Writing from his own experiences, Wright covers such issues as the meaning of grief, why so many blame God during troubles, and strategies for expressing emotions during times of loss.
Richard Exley is author to twenty-nine books. His works have been published in numerous major Christian magazines and he has made special appearances on shows such as 700 Club and Richard Roberts Live.
In When You Lose Someone You Love, a pastor provides tender and compassionate advice to a man suffering a profound grief. This book is meant to show the mourning that grief is a natural and healthy process that God can use to mend broken hearts. The author tenderly walks the reader along the path from sorrow to peace.
Miriam Neff is the founder and president of Widow Connection, and has several projects for widows in Africa. Her one minute feature, New Beginnings, is heard on over 1200 outlets. She is author of ten books.
Neff understands the struggle to comprehend and accept her new life after her husband’s death. Recognizing the need for women to hear from others about the transition, she shares with the reader the practical issues dealing with recovery and change from the loss. From One Widow to Another offers practical advice for those facing the loss of a spouse. Drawing from her own loss, Neff walks with the reader through practical issues to a sense of encouragement.
God’s Care for the Widow is written to comfort and strengthen widows through the challenges of suffering the loss of a husband. The book makes the case that throughout the Old and New Testaments, the God of the Bible makes himself known as a defender and provider for widows. Written under the conviction that the church of Christ is responsible for relieving the distress of widows this book seeks to draw out God’s wisdom for the widow.
Dr. Alla Bozarth is an award-winning poet, Gestalt therapist and Episcopal priest. She has authored some thirty books, several that are a part of the Hazelden series of books on recovery.
A Journey Through Grief brings the sensitivity of a poet, the direction of a counselor and the compassion of a priest to produce thoughtful words that offer practical help through the grieving process.
Gary writes and speaks from more than 30 years of ministry experience, including campus ministry, church-planting in Japan, and three pastorates in Texas and Washington. He now serves as a hospice chaplain, writer, and speaker in central Texas.
In Surviving the Holidays Without You, Gary Roe gives professional and personal counsel to empower people to journey through the difficult steps of processing grief through the holiday seasons. He deals in a sensitive and practical way with unspoken expectations, continual memories and reminders, and the unpredictable emotions and loneliness that accompanies the holidays.
Julie Yarbrough is a native of Dallas, Texas, and the author of the grief ministry program Beyond the Broken Heart: A Journey Through Grief and the book Inside the Broken Heart. Inspired by her personal experience after the death of her husband, Dr. Leighton Farrell, senior minister at Highland Park United Methodist Church for many years, Julie established a support group for widows and widowers and began writing articles and books for persons who are grieving.
In A Journey Through Grief, Yarbrough provides comfort by asserting that grief is not a crisis of faith, but rather a crisis of the heart. Her practical guidance encourages and strengthens during a difficult time. This book is a thoughtful gift to someone coping with the loss of a loved one.
In What to Say When You Don’t Know What to Say, Wright turns a spotlight on helping loved ones cope with loss and tragedy. He reveals practical suggestions of how to communicate through some of the most difficult circumstances of life – those which surround death. Sensitive, practical, and specific, this handy reference includes information you need to be supportive and point to God as the ultimate healer.
Richard Rice is professor of religion at Loma Linda University in Loma Linda, California. He is the author of several books, including God’s Foreknowledge and Man’s Free Will and Reason and the Contours of Faith.
Although suffering and loss is a deeply personal issue, responding to it is often reflective of a blend of our philosophy, theology, ethics and life-experiences. In Suffering and the Search for Meaning, a book that leans toward the academic, Rice provides a blend of intellectual challenge and personal authenticity to dealing with the problems of pain and death.
Tricia Lott Williford was an elementary school teacher before becoming a free-lance writer. As a widow with two preschoolers, she began writing a blog about her loss, sadness and laughter through the tears. Her readership grew dramatically and she became a much sought speaker about recovering from loss around the world.
An elementary school teacher shares the heartbreaking story of the death of her husband and the tender journey back to purpose and peace. In And Life Comes Back, Williford writes with soaring prose about her tender, brave journey as a widow with two young boys in the agonizing days and months that followed his death.
Harold Ivan Smith is a grief specialist on the teaching faculties of Saint Luke’s Hospital, Kansas City, Missouri, and the Carondolet Medical Institute in Eau Claire, Wisconsin. He has facilitated Grief Gatherings, storytelling groups for grievers, at Saint Luke’s Hospital for more than fifteen years.
Grief can become particularly difficult to cope with during the holidays. Looking thoughtfully at the intensity of experiencing loss at the holidays, Smith, in A Decembered Grief, gives insight into working through loss while the world around us celebrates. This book provides comfort and validation to those suffering a recent loss.
C.S. Lewis is one of the most widely renowned authors on Christianity and children’s novel of the 20th century. Lewis is most often known by his series, The Chronicles of Narnia, of which the final book in the series received Carnegie Award, one of the highest marks of excellence in children’s literature.
Written after his wife’s tragic death as a way of surviving the “mad midnight moment,” A Grief Observed is C. S. Lewis’s honest reflection on the fundamental issues of life, death, and faith in the midst of loss. This is a beautiful and unflinchingly honest record of how even a stalwart believer can lose all sense of meaning in the universe, and how he or she can gradually regain his or her bearings.
H. Norman Wright, a licensed Marriage, Family and Child Therapist, has served as a professor at Biola University and Talbot School of Theology while maintaining a private counseling practice. His current focus is in grief and trauma counseling. As a result, he has developed several books dealing with grief and a DVD curriculum for grief counseling.
Sooner or later we all walk the dark journey through the process of grief. Written to encourage anyone who has recently experienced loss, Experiencing Grief is a brief, but powerful tool for helping the reader process through five essential stages of grief which Wright labels as shock, rage, despair, release and finally, peace. This thoughtful book would make an excellent gift to add to a sympathy card.
Philip Yancey is an editor-at-large for Christianity Today magazine and website. He has authored dozens of books, including The Question That Never Goes Away, Prayer, What’s So Amazing About Grace, and The Jesus I Never Knew. Yancey often writes to find answers to the problems of pain, suffering and injustice in the world. At last count, his books have sold over fourteen million copies worldwide, making him one of the best-selling evangelical Christian authors.
In “Where is God When It Hurts?” with grace and compassion, Yancey asks the question that we all ask, wrestles in the same way we all wrestle, and settles on some conclusions that can encourage us all. Using examples from characters in the Bible and drawing on his own personal experience, Yancey looks at why we suffer, why we blame God for it, and why God felt the need to do something about it.